Every February 14th, the world turns red. Couples exchange chocolates, flowers, and cards with chubby little babies (Cupid) shooting arrows. Restaurants are booked solid. It is a multi-billion dollar industry celebrating "Love."
But beneath the commercial veneer lies a story that is not about romance, but about blood. The real St. Valentine was not a greeting card invention. He was a Roman priest who defied an Empire, risked his life for the Sacrament of Marriage, and was beaten to death with clubs.
Here is the true story of the man behind the holiday—and why true love is always a martyrdom.
Who Was He? (The History)
History is a bit murky because there were actually three different "Saint Valentines" who were all martyred on February 14th in the early Church!
- Valentine of Rome: A priest who was martyred around 269 AD.
- Valentine of Terni: A bishop of Interamna (Terni) who was martyred around 197 AD.
- Valentine of Africa: A martyr who died in Africa with a number of companions (little else is known).
Most historians believe the "Valentine of Rome" and the "Valentine of Terni" might be the same person, just remembered by different titles in different cities. The story we celebrate today is primarily based on the Roman priest.
The Context: Claudius the Cruel
It was the 3rd Century. The Roman Empire was in chaos (the "Crisis of the Third Century"). To survive, the Empire needed soldiers. Lots of them. Emperor Claudius II (known as Claudius Gothicus or Claudius the Cruel) noticed a problem: Married men made terrible soldiers. They were reluctant to leave their families for battle, and if they did, they were distracted by worry for their wives and children. Single men, on the other hand, had nothing to lose. They fought harder.
So, Claudius had a brilliant, tyrannical idea: He banned marriage for young men. It was a military draft strategy. If you couldn't marry, you might as well join the legions.
The Rebellion of Fr. Valentine
Most people obeyed the Emperor. You don't say "no" to the guy with the lions and the gladiators. But Fr. Valentine said "no."
He realized that the Emperor's decree was not just unjust; it was a violation of God's law. Marriage is a sacrament. Two baptized Christians have a right to marry that no state can take away. So, he went underground. He began marrying young Christian couples in secret—in whispered ceremonies, likely in homes or even in the catacombs. He was the "Resistance."
The Meaning of the Secret Weddings
Think about what these couples were doing. They weren't just "eloping." They were risking execution to receive a Sacrament. Valentine wasn't just a "romantic." He was a defender of the sanctity of marriage. He believed that the union of man and woman was worth dying for.
The Arrest and Martyrdom
Eventually, the secret got out. (It’s hard to keep a wedding secret forever). Valentine was dragged before the Prefect of Rome. He was beaten with clubs and stones. Finally, on February 14, 269 AD, he was taken to the Flaminian Gate and beheaded.
The "From Your Valentine" Legend
Legend says that while in prison, Valentine befriended his jailer, Asterius. The jailer had a daughter who was blind. Valentine prayed over her, and her sight was restored. Just before his execution, he supposedly wrote her a letter encouraging her to stay close to God. He signed it: "From Your Valentine." It was the first "Valentine," but it wasn't a romantic note. It was a letter from a martyr to a convert.
Why Is He the Patron of... Beekeepers?
St. Valentine is the patron saint of:
- Engaged couples
- Happy marriages
- Epilepsy (Legend says he healed a young man with seizures).
- Beekeepers (Why? Likely because bees are associated with purity and sweetness, or perhaps a pun on the "honey" of love).
- Plague (He was invoked against the plague in the Middle Ages).
Where Are His Bones?
One thing Catholics do that Hallmark doesn't: We keep the bones.
- The Skull: The flower-crowned skull of St. Valentine is on display in the Basilica of Santa Maria in Cosmedin, Rome.
- The Blood: A vial of his blood is in Dublin, Ireland (Whitefriar Street Church).
- Other Relics: Churches across Europe (Terni, Madrid, Poland) claim fragments of his relics.
On February 14th, while the world eats chocolate, pilgrims in Rome kneel before a skull to ask for the grace of a holy marriage.
A Catholic View of Valentine's Day
The secular world has hijacked this feast. It has turned "Love" into a feeling, a commodity, and a sugar rush. The real St. Valentine reminds us that Love is not a feeling. Love is a sacrifice.
- To the Single: Don't be sad if you don't have a date. Valentine died single. His "spouse" was the Church. Use this day to pray for your future spouse (wherever they are) that they remain pure and holy.
- To the Dating: Don't just buy gifts. Pray together. Go to Mass. Ask St. Valentine to protect your chastity.
- To the Married: Renew your vows. Remember that your marriage is a "resistance movement" against a culture that uses people. Be faithful.
The "White Martyrdom" of Marriage
Valentine suffered the "Red Martyrdom" (blood). Most spouses suffer a "White Martyrdom" (daily sacrifice).
- Getting up with a crying baby at 3 AM.
- Forgiving a spouse who was rude.
- Working a job you hate to feed your family.
- Staying faithful when it's hard.
This is the "Valentine Spirit." It’s not about chocolate. It’s about laying down your life for your friend.
A Prayer to St. Valentine
O glorious advocate and protector, St. Valentine, look with pity upon our wants, hear our prayers, relive by your intercession the miseries under which we labor, and obtain for us the divine blessing, that we may be found worthy to join you in praising the Almighty for all eternity: through the merits of Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
(Specifically for those seeking a spouse):
St. Valentine, you risked your life to unite couples in holy matrimony. Pray for me, that I may find a partner who loves God above all things, and that we may help each other to Heaven. Amen.
Conclusion: Reclaim the Day
This February 14th, celebrate. Buy the chocolate. Go to dinner. But remember why. You are celebrating a priest who believed that your love was worth dying for. You are celebrating a God who loves you so much He died for you.
Happy Feast Day of St. Valentine.
Looking for love? Check out our Catholic Guide to Dating or pray the Novena to St. Raphael in the MyPrayerTower app.